Decisions are not hard because options are unknown.
Decisions are hard because we doubt. Specifically, we doubt ourselves.
Doubt can create endless delay.
When we doubt, we over analyse every aspect of a decision, and we search for more information hoping to get rid of the discomfort of uncertainty. This delays the decision even more.
Doubt manifests as lack of self-trust and indecisiveness and is the reason capable people delay making decisions.
To help me make decisions, I have a framework that I have refined through experience over many years.
The 3-step framework has proven invaluable when decisions feel heavy. I use it because it is very effective for getting rid of doubt. It goes like this…
Step 1: I ask myself “why?”.
When I’m faced with a decision, whether it’s a change I want to make, an opportunity I want to pursue or a choice between options, I ask myself a single question: Why do I want this?
The answer is usually one of the following:
- So that I can be someone I aspire to become
- So that I can do something I really want to do, or
- So that I can have something I desire.
I like to get clear on my reasons and pay close attention to how they make me feel. I want to know whether the reasons energise me, excite me, scare me or burden me.
Step 2: I ask myself what the impact will be.
In this step I consider the impact the decision will have on my life, my work or the people around me.
I like to get really honest with myself and process any discomfort that I feel, especially any fear.
When I can articulate my desired impact clearly, and have faced any discomfort that comes up, I feel ready to decide.
Step 3: I ask what would happen if I didn’t decide.
In this step I consider alternatives.
- What happens if I said no?
- What would stay the same?
- What doors would close?
- What would I regret?
This step is critical as it looks at the cost of inaction. Very often this step is the real catalyst for deciding. The decision usually becomes obvious to me at this stage.
If you’re sitting on a decision right now, try using the 3-step decision making framework to give you clarity by slowing down and asking yourself better questions.
By the time you’ve worked through this framework, the decision will be made and it will feel congruent and aligned. It might take a couple of minutes, a few hours or even a few days, depending on the magnitude of decision you’re dealing with. Try it and let me know how it goes.